Friday, November 20, 2009

Parking lot Pimping and other Dating Fails

Chicago men are not shy. Chicago women are... not shy. In a city where the effects of the recession is very apparent, Chicago has amazed me with the ability to make the most out of nothing. Don't have money for the club? Dont have any clothes to wear? In chicago that doesnt mean you cant have that club scene atmosphere.

Only in Chicago is it common practice for teens and adults to park at different parking lots and actually post up the entire night trying to meet and holla at people. Guys will park their hoopty to ballar cars at White Castles, Wal-Greens, Jewel-Osco and other random places, blasting music and trying to holla at ladies. Oh and lets not forget to make special note that these women dress like Lil Kim designed their clothes for them. You have to see it to beileve it. Crowds bigger than inside of 5th Quarter and Necto combined in one parking lot. Theres no fee to get in and its byob.

So why was I there and how do i know about this?.........

Ive learned not to smile in Chicago. Walking down the street with a smile, is like saying to every crazy Deshawn, Tyrone and Ceasar and even Jimmy that you are interested in them.

"Dayum girl you smiling hard, let me get your number?!"
"Awww I see you like Big pappi give me yo digits so i can keep you smiling."

"Girl you smile so hard, make me wanna give you a REAL reason to smile"

Ive learned to "Mean Mug" as an attempt to be more low profile and deter local homies from trying to "get on". As you may notice my vocabulary has increased too.

The dating scene is such a major part of Chicago that this wont be my last blog about it im sure.

Well im gonna go ahead and get back to "getting it in" while yall are just "getting on" what im talking about over here.

love life


After not getting any for a few LONG months, I ended my celibacy in the city of Chicago. New to the area, didn't know alot of people and the start of law school all was making me tense and yall already know from my first blog entry that the whole Tweet "Oops Oh My" was not gonna cut it. I needed the physical release that comes from hot, intense, sexual pleasure.

*Sighs, Another Greek. The org shall remain nameless but been there done that and dayum why did I go back for seconds? Anyways the physical interaction with this guy wasnt the best ive ever had (although ladies a bit of advice Always make him think he is the best you ever had :-) because he will work harder to keep the title and it strokes his ego whie he's stroking your.... ) Anyways the guy was flawless on paper.

No kids, good job, college graduate, property owner, had his own car, im so lucky i thought im kicking it with a real man. (IF a man seems to be tooo good to be true... dayum it girl pay attention). If he is dayum near 30 and single... theres a reason for it. As accomplished as this man was- the crazyness out of his mouth would encourage me to be celibate again. And we all know thats not happening again :-)

Arguements began when he told me that he wanted a baby momma before he got married, to test his future wifey to see how she handles having ties to him. I was so scared that he was trying to trap me that i had to be the one to buy the condoms and grab them just to make sure they werent tappered with. Then he had his view points on what it means to be the Man in the house- he went on to tell me that even if I made more money than him when i enter "his" house not OUR but His house my money was his money. And lets not forget the constant need to pretend to be more busy than he ever was. Im so busy i cant talk now, as he updates, myspace, facebook, twitter and his gmail status as to his new project of downloading the latest skype application and websurfing discounts. OH and how can I forget this balla of a brother was so accomplished and so amazing that its the topic of most our conversations, yet I was expected to pay for everything, including taking him on dates.

So why would I bother with the drama, and headache of something I knew was going nowhere? Maybe its because I care about him and have grown to laugh at his ignorant outlooks on things, maybe its because I value him as a friend despite how he treats me, maybe its because I believe that underneath the asshole cover is a caring guy who loves his frat, family and job, or maybe.. well ... maybe its... well...

All I can say is...... Dayum ... that dick is pretty good tho......

I wonder what he's doing right now... should prolly text him :-)